Jill Stanton of Screw the 9 to 5 is my guest this week on the podcast. She’s a true force to be reckoned with in the online lifestyle entrepreneur space, and I’m really excited to be speaking with her about how she has created a lively, exciting brand and community that’s built from an authentic and interesting space. Having started in 2012 with an affiliate skincare site, and changed and shifted the focus and approach of her business, Jill and her now husband Josh, have grown their business into a full time gig with a team. And now, with their new son, Kai here, they are looking at how they shift their business again to include time and space for a child.

Jill and I have a very fun, fast paced discussion about how she has evolved her online business over the past 6 years. She started in the beauty and skincare business, and met her husband Josh who was using social media to support venues while he was a bartender. The two joined forces, and took their collective knowledge to create the business “Screw the 9 to 5,” which started as a dream on a beach in Thailand.

Jill has a lot to share about HOW to start an online business, and what helps move the needle.

In general, the mindset pieces she shares are:

• Don’t overcomplicate it
• Start imperfectly; you don’t need everything all in order to begin
• Focus on making connections with people who are in the same area and niche as you are, and help each other
• Notice the difference between the “employee” and the entrepreneur mindset
• Don’t be afraid to do things your way
• Learn to be comfortable with the uncomfortable

Some of the more tactical steps she sites are

• Grow your traffic by getting on other people’s platforms through interviews, guest posts, etc
• Be active in Facebook groups about your area of expertise
• You only need a very few things to start: a site, an email optin, and a social media profile
• Create a runway for yourself by building up a business with 80% of your income
• Build traffic and take visibility seriously

Jill also shares about how having a child changes things:

• It means you prioritize the things that move the needle
• She and her husband set aside Fridays for family time
• You may hire people to cover roles
• Don’t mess around with things in your business that are working and don’t need to be tweaked
• Hire people offline to support your family, if you can a cleaner, nanny, order groceries, etc

This week on the podcast, I’m revisiting the conversation with singer and songwriter Morgan Bolender. Morgan is known for her song entitled Mary Oliver, which has gone viral on YouTube. She started her career as a 3rd grade special education teacher and then started on a journey to quite literally find her voice, and listen to her heart. We met at Danielle LaPorte’s White Hot Truth event at Grace Cathedral, where Morgan opened the event for Danielle. I’m so thrilled she’s here today to share about the amazing journey she’s taken to find her voice.⠀

In this episode, Morgan and I talk about:

-          How she was introspective and oddly serious as a child, with solitude bringing her joy

-          Her song writing process with partner Scott

-          What brings her joy: little joys, hugs, and setting intentional time

-          Her journey from being a teacher to becoming a singer and song writer that started with her saying “Take me where I need to go”

-          Living on an organic farm and hearing her own voice singing for the very first time

-          Following your fears and growing

-          How she pitched Danielle LaPorte and all about her singing in Grace Cathedral

-          Her blog, The Unraveling

-          What resistance has looked like for her: trying her very hardest in her creative pursuits, and breaking down the BS that comes with being self taught (and feeling like that is a badge of honor)

Resources:

Mary Oliver on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OGCelKTH5I0

Morgan Bolender’s Website: https://morganbolender.com/

Danielle LaPorte’s White Hot Truth (on Amazon) http://amzn.to/2jxQCn1

Morgan Bolender’s music: https://morganbolender.com/music

Morgan on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/MorganBolender/

Morgan on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/morganbolender/

This week on the podcast, I’m delighted to speak to Debbie Augenthaler on grief, trauma, and healing. Debbie is a psychotherapist,  the author of You Are Not Alone: A Heartfelt Guide to Grief, Healing, and Hope, and she has a private practice in New York City. After losing her husband, she was unexpectedly faced with grief, and found that losing someone that close to you causes ripples of effects; and that the impact of grief does not neatly follow the stages that we’ve all read about. Grief strikes everyone differently, and grieving is not a linear process.

Yes, you go through waves and stages, but the day to day experience of profound loss was not something she found referenced in books. Debbie was grateful to find a therapist during her own time of grief, one who held space for her to grieve.

Working in the financial field for many years, Debbie was in New York for September 11, 2001. She saw the impact of loss again, among her friends and coworkers. This time, however, she also saw that since she had already been through that kind of loss herself, she was able to “be there” for people as they faced loss in their own lives. In her words, “I wasn’t afraid of their grief. I wanted to help.”

Debbie shares all about her book and her journey through grief, and to becoming a psychotherapist on this week’s show. She also talks about four ways to reconnect in the midst of grief:

1. Discover a small bit of hope
2. Meditate and look for reasons to be grateful
3. Be kind to yourself and others. Smile at other people, look for connection
4. Be in nature

Debbie Augenthaler and talk about:

• Growing up the daughter of a marine and moving quite a bit as a child
• Her early joy of going to the library and finding joy and connection in books
• How and why she became a psychotherapist: her love of discovering what drives people and makes them tick
• How her husband died in her arms, and the impact of that unexpected loss
• Her experience of September 11, 2001 in New York City as part of the financial industry community
• The hero’s journey from victim to victor
• What to do if you’re faced with unexpected grief in your life
• How taking comfort in small things is good and affirming for you when you are in the grief process
• That it’s “OK to not be OK.”

Debbie Augenthaler’s Website: http://www.debbieaugenthaler.com/

Debbie’s group on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/DebbieAugenthaler 

Debbie Augenthaler’s Book: You Are Not Alone: A Heartfelt Guide to Grief, Healing, and Hope (on Amazon) https://amzn.to/2kRJKlB

Nicholas Wolterstorff’s Book: Lament for A Son (on Amazon) https://amzn.to/2JAcA7O

Julia Samuel’s Book: Grief Works (on Amazon) https://amzn.to/2Hs3pBf

Julia Samuel on Jump Start Your Joy http://jumpstartyourjoy.com/2018/03/julia-samuel/

This week on the show, I’m exploring the 4 pillars of joy: Inspiration, Mindfulness, Action, and Fun. If you’ve been listening awhile, you know that I think of joy as a wayfinding emotion. I have seen joy dance with people, reach out for people, even when they are in their darkest times or most difficult times. Joy can look like a tiny inkling of hope, a little nudge to call a friend or a doctor; joy looks like that second in your life, like several guests and so many of my clients have sited - that you know that there is “more” to your life than whatever your current crappy circumstances are. That you know you want more, desire more, that you personally are meant for more than what you’re experiencing right now.

This week we’ll look at one of the quotes that inspired my show, and I’m going deeper with it around HOW to find more joy. What I’ve seen in the fact that joy is a choice is that there’s more to it. Joy can be lived out in multiple ways. I see that there are patterns in how I’ve danced with joy in my life, and how I’ve seen joy be jump started in other people’s lives. That part is fascinating. I’m focusing on my favorite four patterns today, the ones I’ve started calling the four tenets or four pillars of joy.

The four pillars are:
1. Inspiration
2. Mindfulness
3. Action
4. Fun

Resources
Kate Swoboda on Episode 135: The Courage Habit
The Courage Habit: How to Accept Your Fears, Release the Past, and Live Your Courageous Life by Kate Swoboda on Amazon
Suzan Colon on Episode 133: Yoga Mind
Suzan Colon’s book: Yoga Mind: Journey Beyond the Physical, 30 Days to Enhance Your Practice and Revolutionize Your Life From the Inside Out
Episode with Fred LeBlanc on Jump Start Your Joy
Episode with Julia Samuel on Jump Start Your Joy
Andrea Owen on Episode 115: How to Stop Feeling Like Shit
How to Stop Feeling Like Shit by Andrea Owen (on Amazon)
A Thousand Names of Joy: Living in Harmony with the Way Things Are by Byron Katie on Amazon
The Power of Intention by Wayne Dyer on Amazon